Relationships have been the source of the greatest triumphs and failures in all of history. The greatest civilizations on earth have come crumbling to the ground in the face of a tragic loves for centuries. Emotions rule us like animals. We are slaves to them and not even the most cynical, most logical, most impassionate person is immune to their power. They course through our hearts and minds like a drug; the most powerful of all drugs. When we are alone, we long for comfort. When we are hurt, we turn to hate. When we suffer a wounded heart, we beg for death. We are passion made flesh. Every word, every sound, every look is done with an intent. We mean every movement, every thought, every whisper, no matter how we justify it. Every joke, ever jest, every insult is derived from truth and truth comes from the heart.

Humanity has come a long way since the dawn of time. We've learned to live in cities, grow our own food, tame nature, tame animals, record our lives and show the world all in the same day. We've created the perfect world for hate and destruction, but for some reason, despite our better wisdom, despite our great intellect, we still search for love among the mass. Logic says to move on and be sterile and clean, that love is for the dumb and fool-hearty. Perhaps that's true. Does love even exist anymore? If it does, where does it exist?

New thought

Relationships.... do they even exist? Have they ever? A relationship is defined as a correlation between to distinct entities. So I suppose on that manner of thinking, yes, they do. I have a relationship with my computer and my TV and my car and my dog and my books. I have relationships with every thing, place, idea, and person I come into contact with. So what about the word "relationship" makes us think of two people, usually one male and one female, holding hands and kissing and being intimate with one another? Why is that the image we think of? I don't hear that word and suddenly think of how my tires are doing; I think of how my boyfriend is doing, or my ex boyfriend. I think about sex and passion and sharing my life with someone.

So what makes a relationship, the kind we all think about, real? How many of us have found that perfect person that we share our lives with? I'd bet not many. I'd bet that more people can relate to this scenario:

"You just think I'm going to go along. Do whatever you want. On your terms, on your time. Like a child or a trophy wife. You just make all the decisions and I'll just say, 'Yes dear'. Only I'm the one giving up everything in my goddamn life! My family, my friends, my job, to be with you! And I have to wonder, if the situation were reversed would you have done the same for Me."
:Silence:
"Well I guess that's an answer." *

It's not a relationship of equals. It's not about love and being there to witness the life of someone you love and cherish. It's about one person being in control and another giving it up, sometimes willingly, sometimes not, but it's almost ALWAYS about control. It's about fucking and getting off. It's about who's the top and who's the bottom or who wears the pants. It's about who cleans and cooks, who sweeps and does the laundry, who gets up in the morning and who sleeps in, it's about winning. There's always the giant scorecard in the sky. It's tit-for-tat. I do you a favor, you do me one. It's about having someone to always be better than or always having someone keep you down. We look for people who will beat us or tell us we're stupid and we cling to it; or we look for people we can belittle and will let us do it and still have sex with us at the end of the night. Guys, girls, straights, gays, and everything in-between: we all do it. We all look for that perfect dictatorship to strap ourselves into. Whether follower or leader, we need to be in a polar situation because the world we live in, isn't polar at all anymore. Yes, the world is stratified; the rich become richer, the poorer become poorer, but the lines between male and female, weak and powerful, young and old become a little more blurred each day, so we, as humans, who are dependent on a world of duality, actively seek out those who will complete a set. One on top of the other.

Fuck it.

I have been in love, but I have never been in a "relationship". I've known heartache and loneliness, but I don't think anyone who is in a "dictatorship" can know happiness, no matter how deep the love. It's about finding that person who balances you and completes you. Many people think that means an opposite; if you're docile, someone aggressive; if you're abusive, someone who will take it. No.

A relationship is finding that one person that you can look them in the eye and tell them without one single thought of anger or remorse or regret, "You're right, I'm wrong."

A very stupid person once said, "Love means never having to say you're sorry." (It was in a movie, but the saying's been around longer than that.) It's shit. Love means that it's ok to be wrong. It's ok to say, "I'm sorry" and "I love you" and "Thank you for teaching me something new; I didn't know that."

The world would be a better place if more "relationships" existed and far fewer "dictatorships" were around. After all, we refuse to have a government rule us like one, so why should we let the most important person in our life rule us as such or dominate our partner like that?